What should I call you?

First name	Surname Family name Last name
William	Shakespeare
Hilary	Clinton

English learners often feel confused about how to address people properly. Many feel uncomfortable asking the question, "What should I call you?" Even native English people find this question awkward. For example, many women don't know how to address their boyfriend's mother. On the other hand, some parents don't know what to call their children's teacher.

Why is "What should I call you?" such a difficult question to ask? Perhaps it's because you are asking the other person to provide their status or position in the world in relationship to yours. This position may involve age, job, education, religion and even marital status.

Since English is a language, rather than a culture, it is difficult to teach English learners exactly how to address people. There will always be some people and some professions that require more formality than others. Addressing people in writing has different rules and formalities than in speaking.

Asking the question

If you are unsure of what to call someone, it's best to use a formal address or simply ask one of these questions:

• What should I call you?
• What should I call your mum / the teacher / the manager?
• Can I call you [first name] ?
• Is it okay if I call you [the nickname you've heard others use] ?
• What's your name? (use in a casual situation like a party or classroom where first names are used)

Answering the question

You might not be the only person wondering about titles. Students, colleagues or acquaintances may not know what to call you. If they seem unsure about how to pronounce your name, or you want them to call you something more casual, help them out:

• Please, call me [first name]
• You can call me [nickname or short form]

Formal Titles in English

In business situations, use formal titles unless the people you meet tell you otherwise. To get someone's attention you can say: "Excuse me, Sir" or "Pardon me, Madam/Ma'am." To greet someone you can say: "Hello Sir" or "Good morning, Madam/Ma'am."